Updated: Oct 24
There are many starting points in taking the first step towards consciously reinventing self and making behavioural and psychological life changers that get you into more in alignment of living in Your truths, at least beginning to discover what those truths are and what they mean to you.
I am going to start with discussion around Co-Dependency!
What do you know about Co-Dependency?
Co-dependency is a learned behavior that can be passed down from one generation to another. It can be described as a relationship that requires 1 person who believes they are "saving" someone and a person who wants someone to give them all the solutions to their problems, or.... a relationship brought together by facades! Each person is choosing each other based upon, power and control, giving up power and control and so the relationship is "shallow". There are many definitions that can be found, but what it comes down to is that the relationship is a unhealthy one that limits the empowerment of a person and enables toxic outcomes for both parties.
How do you know you're in a Co-Dependent relationship?
What would it feel like if you were in one?
What would it feel like if you were not in one?
What would your thoughts around your own strengths be?
Co-Dependency is a passion of mine because of how I "woke-up" to how I was living the lies and being lead by my own deceptions that I believed , that had me thinking of others before myself, depleting myself of my dreams and passions and not living in my purpose. I felt oppressed, disconnected to myself, voiceless, inauthentic, powerless, fearful and conditioned in the many co-dependent relationships I had.
Have you ever believed that because of the love you feel, it would be enough to light the love in others? Except that the person who you were lighting up with your love, was someone who needed to have the other person put them first........
Does it resonate with you?
Firstly, when you think about it...I was pretty presumptuous to think that I could change anyone by loving them! As innocent as it may sound. How could loving someone be a negative, unless what was thought to be love, turned out, it really wasn't? What is love? How should it feel and look? Have you ever experienced unconditional love? ( another blog)
Secondly, the other person took the love and used it to manipulate me into believing I was responsible for their happiness. If I didn't show the expectations of how love should look, then I was an unloving person, something I could not bare to be labeled as.
So, I have started with Co-Dependency as a first step towards mastering self. Why? Because if we can understand our relationship to "Self" first, then we can make changes to our thoughts and behaviors that got us into Co-Dependent relationships, making healthier and more desirable connections with self and others. If we learn how to treat ourselves-Then we can teach people how you want to be treated.
Click here for a checklist of Co-Dependent Patterns and Characteristics by: Co-Dependence Anonymous